So Hostess has closed. We have all heard that. Another American brand down the drain, no bailout for those 18k workers, no recourse for a union that flushed workers down the drain.
Here’s the funny thing since the news came out I have heard basically this same conversation from almost all of my friends/family (even my Dad!):
“I’m not going to miss all those unhealthy foods.”
or “America is sure going to be healthier with out all the trans-fats clogging their arteries”
but then the statement is almost always followed by ‘I will miss those cupcakes though’, or ‘I wonder how much longer we can get a snowball?’ or ‘hard to imagine no more wonder bread or twinkies’.
What makes me laugh is that almost everyone I know plays the part of the healthy eater, glad Hostess is gone and ridding America from its guilt-ridden treats but secretly are lamenting the loss. I guess it is the definition of a guilty pleasure!
I wonder if part of the remorse is like watching Saturday morning cartoons. They are syrupy and stupid but you kind of like them. They remind you of being a kid again and for those of that had pleasant childhoods the remembrance is pleasant. Perhaps we like such food because when we were a kid we didn’t have to worry so much about carbs, organic food, clean eating or any of that crap? We could just eat a twinkie if our Mom told us it was okay.
Perhaps we like things like hostess because we secretly LIKE THEM! In one Washington Post article about the mass selloff of twinkies on ebay a vendor described the situation well:
“If buyers do not bite, Mr. Edmonds is not sure what he will do with his supply. He does not even like Twinkies.
“I do like to have a Ding Dong every once in a while though,” he said.”
(I swear that same caveat is being said by nearly every American)
I remember when I saw Martha Stewart making her own peeps and I felt tired and a little disgusted. What a waste of time when the original are delicious. I’m sure she would be insulted at the idea of store bought peeps but at Easter I wouldn’t want them any other mixed up, gussied way, just gooey, crispy peeps. I like gourmet food but I also like familiar food where I know how it will taste and what it will be like. I think that is the appeal of a lot of foods like Hostess. They are easy to eat, absorb and enjoy.
What foods do you like that you are slightly embarrassed to admit liking? Come on, let it out. I can think of some:
1- Chicken Nuggets- not fancy chicken strips (although those are good too). I’m talking about crunchy little chicken pieces of manufactured yumminess and I get all the sauces I can muster.
2- pizza- This is really a guilty pleasure but I like all variations of pizza, not just the bubbly gourmet kind with fancy cheeses but the greasy pepperoni from Little Caesars (and I love Crazy bread!)
3- Movie popcorn- I love popcorn in general but I like the salty, yellow, intoxicating smelling popcorn at the movie theater. I do! (With extra butter of course).
4- Sweet/Sour candies. When I went on my sugar fast the thing I craved the most was sour patch kids. Strange but something about that lip puckering sweet and sour sounded so good.
5- Ice Cream- I’ve never met a flavor or brand of ice cream I don’t like. I love the fancy gourmet kinds but also the big buckets of generic vanilla.
I also love ice cream novelties like drumsticks and fudgicals
6- Popsicles- I love those double popsicles in cherry, root beer, grape, banana, orange, etc. You know the one’s?
7- Ramen noodles- I don’t like canned soup- ever, ever, ever! I don’t eat it unless I’m forced and if I’m sick I’d much rather have ramen than canned soup. I just don’t like the tecture of it.
8- Really hot fresh french fries. They just aren’t the same baked. Need the deep frier. I love sauces.
9- Pillsbury- I think those crescents and biscuits are delicious.
10- Slurpees- Love all the favors, all the time.
11- Donuts- I love chocolate, maple donuts, simple glazed, powdered, whatever! The smell makes me crazy. Even those little powdered one’s make me happy.
12- Crackers- I love Chicken n’ biscuit, ritz, saltines, club crackers whatever. YUM!
13- pudding snacks- not fancy kind. Just standard pudding cups.
14- On same line lunchables. Ah the decadence!
( I could keep going…)
What about you? What do you have to talk yourself into getting a salad for? What transfat nightmares do you linger over in the market and then head for the whole wheat section…
Be honest! Who out there is secretly going to miss the twinkie?